Oct 20, 2006

Headbands

Cordelia of The Cordettes (Soviet Secret Police if they cared a lot about shoes) hasn't made an appearance here of late....do you suppose I'm getting soft? Or--dare we say--more tolerant of other people's fashion choices?

Well, I may have been, but it's over now. I just can't stand it any longer.

One of the many sales tables littering the sidewalks along Spring Street has an amusing sign: "For Her: headbands!" The table offers nothing besides headbands, so you have to ask yourself why the saleswoman felt the need to specify that she is only selling headbands to or for women.

Well, it turns out she was right. Guys are trying to wear headbands, and it is very very bad. The trend seems to be using very thin plastic headbands to push back curly over-the-ears locks (usually blonde, as I have to say this looks to be a Eurotrash thing) so that they stand straight up on the top of the head. Like a halo.

Headbands! On guys! This is WAY worse than manpris.

Unfortunately, there's more. Men aren't the only offenders. Women, while generally allowed to wear headbands, have started doing it wrong. Headbands are supposed to push back the hair, right? That, apart from decoration, is their general purpose, yes? So could someone please explain to me why on earth a woman would want to place the band right below her hairline, so that it cuts across the upper forehead, holding nothing back and generally looking like that guy from Star Trek, who was on Reading Rainbow and always had to have that silver thing over his eyes, had pushed it up just to see if maybe now his eyes worked without it, since the Klingons did something radioactive to him.

It didn't work for Lt. Commander Geordi, and it definitely doesn't work for anyone else.

4 comments:

Guy said...

Well, you DO work in the land of New York's Eurotrash, so I'm not surprised that you've come face to face with this nonsense. Can't you stop this awful trend by making fun of them or taking their picture and telling them you're sending the shots to Glamour Don'ts?

Anonymous said...

just get John Waters to film them

Jeremy said...

We must not forget about the murse.

Cordelia said...

Um...I've forgotten about the murse. What's the murse?

Oh. Duh. Man-purse. Is horrible, and not at all allowed.